Did you ever asked yourself?

Did you ever asked yourself, what’s the difference between a man, and a man in loved? I found out today what happens when you are in love, it’s like every man, everybody when they have a normal life, they just live, everybody around them are behaving normal, but one day one guy comes to you and starts speaking without reason, he is trying to show you a fence, and he is trying to make you feel like that piece of fence it’s the most beautiful thing in this world, it’s the sun, the moon, the alarm of his clock in the morning, the thing that makes him wake up, and the thing that makes him going all day long, that that piece of fence, in a small town, somewhere in the mountains, that piece of fence is the world for him. Did you ever thought that this is possible? When you feel love, you have no reason, everything has another reason for you, the reason for you is her, the reason for living, the reason for explaining somebody on the street that the piece of fence it’s your love, and you tell your love that she is like a piece of fence. This is love, love is without reason, love is, love changes, love can change everybody, love can give you reasons, love, love can make you be unreasonable, to others near you, and love is when you look at your lover and you compare him with a tree, because every time you see a tree, and the leaves moving when the wind blows, and when you see every leaf in that tree, moving independent, when every move it’s like passion, when you touch somebody gentle, like the leafs are moving, they are touching with passion her face, and because you feel every poor of your body asking for passion, when you compare her with passion, you feel like the tree it’s her, you want to compare her with everything, because the world around you it’s her, actually she is your world. Did you ever asked yourself, what’s the difference between a man, and a man in loved?

short abstract in english

This is something new, for those that never triedto understand the meaning of life, please read slowly and with care.

Why I started this is because I had to start something to do to not get bored and go to sleep because I’m almost sleeping with my eyes opened I can see the first lines of what I started to begin and I like this way how I write because even me and you and everybody that can fly or stop down and get the stone to I don’t understand nothing.

poezie abstracta

Si sorbind cu teama
Spre a ta arama
Cu margele paletate
De lumina si infricosate

Cantand spre tine o lumina
De sculptura prea putina
Si destul pentru a se umple
Stergatorul de lumina la stele

Nu am nevoie de stejari
Si de parcele de ari
Cum verdele apune spre
Un lagar plin de disperare

Abstract

Am ceva pentru voi, ceva mai ciudat, sper sa va placa. Cititi cu atentie si incet sa intelegetzi fiecare cuvant.

Am plecat de cand eram mic beam apa la ghiuveta si pe teava de la arma umbla o pilula care trage tare in vizita vine si se loveste unde nu il doare la genunchi si are o busola pe mare cautare de cuvinte spre care ajungem la destinatie.

Sterge in curand vine vizita si oboseste somnul care te invaluie cu arome de vanilie si nu se duce nicaieri cand vrea sa plece inchide usa si trage zavoru cum nu ai tras in viata ta are sens atunci cand vine vizita si sterge in curand am tras zavoru.

Incepand din terenul de vizavi este o cofetarie si gogosi la mare te duc cu trenu care lanseaza racheta in spatiu de mica anvergura si teleporteaza unde cu soc de primavera unde trecem peste doua blocuri si vedetzi terenul de vizavi.

Greierasul care umbla pe monitor cu tastele crescand intre degetele lui era tipatul de lupta a celor viteji indreptatiti pentru dreptul lor cu care spre taramul neantului cade lovinduse de temerile individului prezent in cursul mileniului trecand peste nemurirea sufletului ingenunchiat spre negura de oboseala si tristete cu care neavand unde ii pune sandalele ai imbunatatit sprijinul credintei in locuitori si preluarea de rezerve incetand sa spere spre o noua zi incepe sa apuna.

Tusind inspre soare privind la mare cand apune si trece spre partea din care se indreapta cu viteza despre care va ziceam ca la persoana a doua scara pe dreapta pleaca una din cele mai indepartate supernove si baloane colorate cu culori de floare cu rotile spre ceata de holera inecanduse cu una din cele mai rostite cuvinte din care va raspund ca trece elefantu inspre comuna la cinci sate distanta masurata cu carioca pe buze iese luna intunecata spre munte cand rasare la apus in cinci etape cu bezele crocante sunt si culorile de raceala.

Shhh .. this will be our little secret world

Shhh .. this will be our little secret world.

During my last days I had some unusual feelings, not so intense but though they were there, trying to break trough the skin of indifference that I had. Today I had my little secret world, today we talked, today we shared secrets, today we shared our dreams, today we cried on eachothers sholder and today we liked everything we did. Hwo knows what will happen tomorrow.

A stranger opened what was closed with a big locker and this stranger found the key to a door so closed and so secret. Today I built another secret world, but this time was nice, with secrets, with whispers whispered close to our ears. You told me something, I told you something, you gave me something, I gave you something, you cried and I hold you hand, you hold my hand and I cried.

Today we had a little walk in the rain, today you told me that it’s good for me to feel the rain, and I run in the rain beside you, I felt every drop, I closed my eyes each time a rain drop touched your skin, and today you told me where and when then I told you how and with who. You were there and I watched you, I saw myself trough your eyes, and you watched me touching every part of your body with my thoughts, I asked you why, you told me nothing and I understood.

Why do I have to find this kind of strangers in this situation where I can’t do something about it. Why every stranger that I met it’s not like this stranger?

nothing but dreams and hopes

I want to find a foster home for kids and to find the light of happiness, I want to see how just a new presence in somebody’s life can light a pear of eyes fallen in the darkness of this fucking life. I hope to find one kid there to show that this life it’s worth living though for some there is no hope.

If I find there, eyes that can glow or eyes that can have that desire of life, that means I’m a fucking bastard that complains about a life that’s almost nice, rather than complaining about a life that is almost empty, like a life of some kids from a foster home.

Did you ever felt lost inside this labyrinth of decisions and steps that we call life? I’m feeling lost everyday, somehow or somewhere. Sometimes during a day I feel like I don’t belong to that part of the world, or I don’t belong to that part of the day. And I feel lost, I’m struggling to keep my head out of these things that keeps us so linked to reality, a reality that we build every day we live.

Every time we make a friend, or every morning when we live to work, we add more and more information and more and more links between us like individuals and society around us. We scream for knowledge and we are hungry for feelings, for words to keep us in this world, to keep us in a world where we have families and friends and social life.

But when we are alone, only you and you realize that you are only somebody between others manufactured life’s, you feel yourself lost, what if you didn’t decided for a friend to come into your life, what if he decided that, what if your birth it’s linked only to your parents desire of happiness, you are just a product of people that surrounds you.

You interact, and you change yourself depending of people that you are linked to, so I’m going to try a different approach of this life, and take control, and do something with it. I want to see, I want to find somebody else that feels the same. That feels that this world it’s only a world we see with our own eyes, and I want to have questions about how life really is.

Real life, not my world witch I see trough my eyes. I want to see if this world has the power to hide, I want to see if we have the power to change this world, to feel different and to see reality around us.

Whenever you take a decision think about it, see it like a change in the future, how that change will affect your future, if that decision will make you, change yourself in somebody else that you don’t want to become.

With every decision we take, let’s make this life better, for us and or the people around us, let’s find a balance between our desired reality and other’s desired reality’s. Ask a close friend or a member of your family what’s a perfect life for him, and try to build it inside your perfect life. You will see how dreams are so hard to mix.

So, this is the secret to a happy life, the life I told you about when I searched for happiness, the life that I want to build myself around me and it takes so long. The life in witch I’m happy, and people around me are happy, I want to find the person that will feel happy, about sharing my dreams, or a person that dreams the same like I do, so we can melt our 2 perfect life’s into one.

That’s the perfection and happiness I’m looking for. So I hope one day I will be stupid enough to take a decision that will change my life and I will have the power to let, to build happiness around me, or to build a life in witch I’m happy.

life without you

I had a thought these days, and I don't know if I'm crazy or not, maybe I am, or maybe not, time will tell. In my thought I give up my dreams, my job, my everything for something new, or for something I think that will worth this action.

It took let's say a couple of years to build everything I have but in my opinion I can forget about everything in one second if I will have the option to have something better then what I have now. Let's say I fallow my dreams I fallow whatever I did untill now, and I end up in one day, just with my dreams, instead of whatever I can have if I fallow another path.

I'm just thinking that I can build everything again, or I can have other dreams better then the ones I have now, or not better just let's say, dreams built with somebody else, dreams in 2.

Ok .. stop .. I started to write this .. before a long discussion .. now .. I don't feel like writing any more .. so .. let's forget about what I said .. and .. maybe one day I will finish this. Ciau .. and .. let's hope for better days to come ahead ..

Happines

Why do we even try to be happy, when happiness it's only a dream? We hold it in our hands for one second or for one minute or for one hour, or in the best case for a lifetime. I guess we never expect that happiness will come or we don't expect the happiness that we have to fade away. We can not see further then the eyes can see, in our precious life we live with our hearts, we live with our thoughts, we live with our happiness and we live with our beliefes.

Is this a good life that we are liveing or we are just trying to keep walking because one day for one second or for one minute or even for a life time we'll be happy? I'm just trying to find an answer or I'm just trying to ask again for a little happiness.

It's even more ocuard how happiness can be packed, it happened for those amongst us that we are the luckiest that this happiness to be packed and delivered for one second so you will not have the time to feel it, to hug it, to know it. But for people who had the chance to taste the happiness, to love it, to embrace it, and when happiness looks like the most beautiful face you ever saw in your life, then you got yourself into a big trouble, because you will love it. You will love to be happy, you can hold your breath and happiness will give you air, you can make a bet with the devil that the happiness you have will last for an eternity because this is how it makes you feel, this is how happiness feels like, it changes your heart it changes you forever.

For the people that felt this for a long time, it's hard to let go, and it's hard to not dream yourself being happy, making all those things you done in the time when you were happy.

For me it was a time when I was happy, I can say that even now I'm happy, but it's not the same, it's not the same happiness, I'm laughing because I have to, I'm laughing because it's needed in this society, but somewhere in the past, happiness laid in my path and it gaved me the feeling that those days where the brightest in my life, that those days where the days of my life, now when it's gone.

It's the moment when we decide to let go and jump with our eyes opened or with them shut, and to plunge inside the light of happiness, a light that blinds us. We can't to see that in the same moment you loose everything, you will be in the worst state you can ever be.

I was one of the unlucky people who tasted it, and now I'm walking on the streets trying to steal it from those who have it. I'm watching every face who passes by me, and if you see the light in their eyes, if just for one second you see the smile of a happy person, you try with everything you have to get a good look and hope that it will last you till the next person who passes by. You think that they have what you had, the only thing that matters in this life. The thing that can make our lives glow or the only thing that can make our smile hide in the shadow of sadness.

I'm not complaining, I had enough happy moments that it can last me for a lifetime, whatever I do from now on, It's just because I have the chance to dream more about myself beeing happy.

It takes a brave heart to face the facts then to hide from them; it takes a brave soul to keep loving someone no matter what, and not to put them aside for some reasons. And like a good friend said, "I do care, I care about world peace and I really want wounded birds to fly", but is that enough? Can one thought change the world, can your thoughts change your life, and can you decide what's good and what's bad.

It seams like for every second of happiness somebody else has one second of unhappy life, for every smile on a face, there is a tear falling on another one, for every first breath that a new borne child takes another last breath goes away, for every drop of rain that falls giving birth it's another one that kills.

I want this world to have just on one side so we'll never know the other part, so we'll never have the chance to live and to know if better or worst time will come, or if we are happy or not. Indeed the more you learn the less you know, for every thing you find out there are another two that you have to learn about.

For those out there who had the chance to be happy, or for those out here who are happy in this second, I have only one advice, either you forget about it, or do whatever it takes to hold it there. If you are happy when it rains, move where it rains the most. If you are happy when your dog it's around you, take him along with you everywhere you go. If you love somebody, love with everything you have and enjoy every moment you have of happiness because it's possible that one day the only thing that makes you happy not to be there, and then you will see also the tear that drops, or the breath that goes away, or the rain that kills, or how meaningless is your life without the only thing that makes you happy.

And because I'm an optimist and a little bit selfish because even now I want to taste the flavor of happiness I will late you know about my happiness and in the same time I will have the chance to remember myself in those days. It once started when I opened my eyes and I saw happiness, I had the chance to kiss happiness, to hug it, to love it, to wake up every morning and smile like a happy person. I walked hand in hand with my happiness, I drank coffee beeing happy, I had this happynes inside every little part of my body. I said good things and I said bad things when I was happy, and worst then all these things I even had the guts to look at my happines and say bye and let go without doing nothing.

I hope that another person has my happynes, I hope my happynes lives for somebody else now, and it make's other people as happy as I was. I was happy, and one day I want to be again stupid enough to let happynes come into my life.

About what is happening in Tibet

Hy friends!

You take 2 enemies! Until I'll tell you about the enemies, you can think about who is loosing when these 2 enemies are fighting.
CHINA: economic worldwide superpower, the country witch it's hosting the Summer Olimpic Games in 2008, the country with whom nobody wants problems.
TIBET: "free" region controlled by china. Young tibetans have hope for obtaining the independence, and this is the reason why they protest. They are encouraged by people around the world that know about their problem and they are trying to get some attention upon this issue that affects millions of people, trying to stop the olimpic flame witch chinese they want to put it on Everest, the highest peak on this planet.

So have you though about how is loosing when these country are fighting? Mountain climbers around the world because they are trapped in main camps by Nepal's army, with interdictions to leave from that area and to communicate with everybody else. For this they asked for satellite phones. This problem will continue until the olimpic flame will be moved on Everest, this has a big impact for the expeditions that are now in the area. Constantin (Ticu) Lacatus is in Nepal for climbing the neighbor of Everest, Lhotse (8515m), so he is also affected by this problem of interdiction of moving from main camp (6200m) Lacatus Constantin found out about the birth of of his daughter and now it's communicating with his family and Romanian jurnalist trough the second satellite phone. Now his nickname its "the captain" because he kicked an American climber witch he had a banner with "Free Tibet / Fuck China"

Let's hope that he will have the opportunity to finish his expedition and return back home with another story to tell from his trip.

News from http://www.carpati.org/ (Romanian website)

About the peak Lhotse:

Lhotse (in Nepal officially ल्होत्से, in China officially Lhozê; Tibetan in Wylie transliteration: lho rtse; Chinese: 洛子峰, Pinyin: Luòzǐ Fēng) is the fourth highest mountain on Earth and is connected to Mount Everest via the South Col. In addition to the main summit at 8,516 metres above sea level, Lhotse Middle (East) is 8,414 metres and Lhotse Shar is 8,383 metres. It is located at the border between Tibet
(China) and Nepal.

w t f

What the fuck, why shouldn't I make this ... like a funny thing to do all day long.

I read so many bloggs, that I think I know everything about blogs, so let's test this theory, and get started with a real life of blogging!

Right now I send one e-mail to a list of friends, but I guess instead of sending e-mail's I can use this blog.

I guess they will be happy about it, so I will not be a stress every day in theyr e-mail.

Let's hope for new things in our life